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  • Caught in the middle


    • Ring each others door bells and run away ?

      Spat with India forcing rethink says Pakistan envoy Sohail Mahmood | IE | Mar 15 2018

      tension has been brewing between the two sides for a couple of months — one of the incidents involved the doorbell of the Indian deputy High Commissioner J P Singh being rung at 3 am.

      Since the Indian side felt that this was done by Pakistan’s security agencies, the Pakistan deputy high commissioner Syed Haider Shah’s door bell was also rung at 3 am in next few days.
      Indian government sources, however, said that they will look into the “genuine complaints, if any”. The Pakistan High Commission has lodged protests at least five times, and each of the incidents have been reported to the Ministry of External Affairs.
      Last edited by Double Edge; 18 Mar 18,, 21:02.


      • New blend

        Killing you softly

        Last edited by Double Edge; 19 Mar 18,, 18:20.


        • Unbreakable

          Spain Sheep pain

          England Between the water people

          Ireland Red mane people

          Norway Yellow something people (?)

          Italy Not speak so clearly people

          French Moustache people

          Russia Red shirt people

          Ukraine Yookwein

          Romania Woomeniya

          Greece Gwik

          Turkey T'ook

          Last edited by Double Edge; 24 Mar 18,, 20:45.


          • To conduct self-inspection, cleanup and improvement

            This just in

            China’s media regulator is cracking down on video spoofs, the official Xinhua new agency reported.

            Xinhua said video sites must ban videos that “distort, mock or defame classical literary and art works”

            Reuters separately reviewed a copy of the directive, which was unusually labelled “extra urgent”.

            “It means a lot of content makers will have to transition and make their content more serious. For ‘extra urgent’ notice like this, you have to act immediately,” said Wu Jian, a Beijing-based analyst.

            Despite strict censorship, China has a fairly lively online community of bloggers, who frequently respond to breaking events with humorous – and sometimes risqué – sketches and short videos, although they often face their posts being taken down.

            A TV reporter’s theatrical eyeroll during a long-winded question at a Beijing news conference stole the show during China’s annual parliament session last week, exploding on Chinese social media before censors intervened.

            A video of the eyeroll became the source material for many parodies and satirical performances.

            JustXiait, a team of Chinese parody bloggers famous for satirical dubbed-over videos from movies, said in an official microblog post that the group would voluntarily delete all videos “to conduct self-inspection, cleanup and improvement”.


            • In case you were wondering...

              Last edited by Double Edge; 24 Mar 18,, 21:55.


              • About those Between the waters and Red manes people


                • You'll have to answer to the Coca-Cola Company.

                  Last edited by Ironduke; 26 Mar 18,, 18:59.
                  "Every man has his weakness. Mine was always just cigarettes."


                  • From Reddit

                    Three guys are walking through the woods when they find a lamp. One of them picks it up, rubs it, and out pops a Genie. It booms "You have finally freed me after all these years, so I'll grant each one of you 3 wishes."

                    The first guy immediately blurts out "I want a billion dollars." POOF, he's holding a printout that shows his account balance is now in fact $1,000,000,003. The second man thinks for a bit, then says "I want to be the richest man alive." POOF, he's holding papers showing his net worth is now well over 100 billion. The third guy thinks even longer about his wish, then says "I want my left arm to rotate clockwise for the rest of my life." POOF, his arm starts rotating.

                    The Genie tells them it's time for their second wish. First guy says: "I want to be married to the most beautiful woman on earth." POOF, a stunning beauty wraps herself around his arm. Second guy says "I want to be good-looking and charismatic, so I can have every girl I want." POOF, his looks change and the first guy's wife immediately starts flirting with him. Third guy says "I want my right arm to rotate counter-clockwise until I die." POOF, now both his arms are rotating, in opposite directions.

                    The genie tells them to think very carefully about their third wish. First guy does, and after a while says "I never want to become sick or injured, I want to stay healthy until I die." POOF, his complexion improves, his acne is gone and his knees don't bother him any more. Second guy says "I never want to grow old. I want to stay 29 forever." POOF, he looks younger already. Third guy smiles triumphantly and says "My last wish is for my head to nod back and forth." POOF, he's now nodding his head and still flailing his arms around.

                    The genie wishes them good luck, disappears, and the men soon go their separate ways. Many years later they meet again and chat about how things have been going. First guy is ecstatic: "I've invested the money and multiplied it many times over, so me and my family will be among the richest of the rich pretty much forever. My wife is a freak in the sheets, and I've never gotten so much as a cold in all these years." Second guy smiles and says "Well, I built charities worldwide with a fraction of my wealth, I'm still the richest guy alive and also revered for my good deeds. I haven't aged a day since we last met, and yes, your wife is pretty wild in bed." Third guy walks in, flailing his arms around and nodding his head, and says: "Guys, I think I fucked up."
                    Last edited by Red Team; 26 Mar 18,, 19:35.
                    "Draft beer, not people."


                    • The post about "politicians making up their own numbers" in the tariff thread brought this old, but still good video to mind.

                      "Every man has his weakness. Mine was always just cigarettes."


                      • Entertaining even if I couldn't quite catch what was said


                        • UK communications act 2003

                          Improper use of public electronic communications network
                          - A person is guilty of an offence if, for the purpose of causing annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety to another....
                          - A person guilty of an offence under this section shall be liable, on summary conviction, to imprisonment for a term not exceeding six months of to a fine not exceeding level 5 on the standard scale

                          Sounds familiar...


                          • New phrase

                            Nothing Burger
                            Last edited by Double Edge; 29 Mar 18,, 15:11.


                            • My heart is in Havana

                              Last edited by Double Edge; 29 Mar 18,, 18:04.


                              • State elections are due in a month and its a tight battle between the incumbent and the BJP.

                                problem ? Modi & his deputy cannot speak Kannada so they speak in Hindi and use translators because not all people in the state can understand Hindi.

                                Sometimes it doesn't work out