Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

The Corpsman was right!!!!!!

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • The Corpsman was right!!!!!!

    It does cure everything.

    Why I always start my day with three 800mg Motrin and a 32oz cup of lifer juice


    Navy Doctor Cures Cancer With Motrin


    NAVY DOCTOR CURES CANCER WITH MOTRIN
    NAVAL STATION NORFOLK — Lt. Cmdr. Jim Holmes has seen thousands of patients as a Navy doctor, and cured hundreds. His secret? Motrin, available generically as ibuprofen, and known by service members the world over as Vitamin M.

    “I’ve cured all sorts of diseases with Motrin: Menstrual cramps, backaches, amputations, that Exorcist thing where a person starts shaking all crazy … You name it, I’ve treated it,” he said.

    So when a 22-year-old Sailor came into his office complaining of nausea and exhaustion, Holmes immediately diagnosed him with malignant melanoma and started him on an intense course of ibuprofen, 9000 mg of Motrin a day.

    “That’s four times the maximum recommended dosage,” said Holmes, a ground-breaking medical practitioner who is fully-licensed. “You really need to get that medicine deep in there.”

    The sailor initially experienced serious intestinal bleeding, but within three weeks, he was no longer complaining about the nausea or the exhaustion that brought him to the doctor’s office in the first place. Dr. Holmes concluded that the Motrin regimen had cured the young sailor of skin cancer, and published his findings in The American Journal of Cancer Research, in which he wrote, “treatments consisting entirely of extremely high doses of ibuprofen showed reduction of cell viability and colony reduction of cancer cells.”

    While his study still under peer review, Dr. Holmes is rumored to be in contention for the Nobel Prize in Medicine. Asked what he thought about his potential nomination, Holmes remained humble.

    At press time, he had updated his Facebook status to say “I’m not saying I’m a genius, but I did just cure cancer.”
    (gotta love duffel blog)

  • #2
    Well, I'm rather sure that DEATH will cure anything.

    It's all a joke here but people who try or fake suicide when it comes to things like "aspirin"........that's a pretty miserable way to die with organ failure (nutshell speaking).

    Comment


    • #3
      Gunny,

      We both know the article is bullshit....it ain't Motrin which is the miracle drug...its APCs!
      “Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
      Mark Twain

      Comment


      • #4
        "...I always start my day with three 800mg Motrin and a 32oz cup of lifer juice"

        Folks commonly ignore the psychoactive aspects of that particular chemical cocktail. Too bad. 4000 mics of pure acid could never lift Tim Leary or Aldous Huxley to places E-5/6 squad leaders and section chiefs routinely reach on a concoction of the above, 60 hours with no sleep and five-ten 18-21 year old guys who still need baby-sitting.

        WHOLE new level the moment you reach for the nicotine and Hershey bar (w/almonds).
        "This aggression will not stand, man!" Jeff Lebowski
        "The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool." Lester Bangs

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Albany Rifles View Post
          Gunny,

          We both know the article is bullshit....it ain't Motrin which is the miracle drug...its APCs!
          Maybe in the Army. The Navy/Marine Corps drug of choice since the mid 80s has been Motrin.

          When I first enlisted, 1980 there were 2 go-to remedies. If you coughed, Doc hooked you up with Terpin Hydrate. If you ached then it was Tylenol 3 (with codeine).
          Then the urinalysis program started and the Navy figured out that they had a bunch of codeine addicts. After 85 if the Doctor proscribed a narcotic, he had to seen justification to DoN.

          From personal experience

          Early 80s, sprained ankle= Tylenol3 , Bruised ribs= Tylenol3

          Late 80s and beyond. Broke collarbone= 800mg Motrin, All four wisdom teeth extracted at one sitting= Motrin and icepack, Knee surgery=Motrin. Pain during/after a hump=Motrin
          The corpsmen would give it out in ziplock sandwich bags. When I retired, I was taking 6-8 a day. And had been for a few years.

          Should have seen the look on the Air Force Doctors face on my first visit after I retired and went to Tyndall. Trying to get my Vitamin M fix. Especially when I showed him the applicable parts of my med records where a doctor had prescribed that regiment. I'm taking newer drugs, better drugs, safer drugs and they don't do as good as the wonder drug.

          Motrin cures everything.
          Last edited by Gun Grape; 15 Jul 14,, 04:09.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by S2 View Post
            [B]WHOLE new level the moment you reach for the nicotine and Hershey bar (w/almonds).
            Ahh the days. Open up the sleeping bag. bust a heat tab and warm some water. Chew a few motrin,shave, rinse out the canteen cup then make a cup full of Cafe Bustelo, grab that pouch of Levi Garrett. Take 5 to enjoy the start of a new day. Then go wake the kids up.

            And to think, they paid us for those moments

            Comment


            • #7
              "Motrin cures everything."

              Word.

              "...And to think, they paid us for those moments"

              Uhhh...let me get back to you on that.
              Last edited by S2; 15 Jul 14,, 04:22.
              "This aggression will not stand, man!" Jeff Lebowski
              "The only true currency in this bankrupt world is what you share with someone else when you're uncool." Lester Bangs

              Comment


              • #8
                I sometimes forget how young some of you are.

                APCs, or or aspirin-phenacetin-caffeine, was Motrin before Motrin was Motrin. It was in widespread use in military medicine until 1981 when they found out it could kill you.

                http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phenacetin

                Those little suckers were given for everyting from the clap to a sucking head wound.

                I switched from the morning APC/coffee/dip to Motrin/coffee/dip regime in the AM about 1982. The dip is gone and Aleve has taken the place of the Motrin....but the coffee is forever!!!
                Last edited by Albany Rifles; 15 Jul 14,, 13:59. Reason: I forgot the damn link!
                “Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
                Mark Twain

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Albany Rifles View Post
                  I sometimes forget how young some of you are.

                  APCs, or or aspirin-phenacetin-caffeine, was Motrin before Motrin was Motrin. It was in widespread use in military medicine until 1981 when they found out it could kill you.

                  Phenacetin - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

                  Those little suckers were given for everyting from the clap to a sucking head wound.

                  I switched from the morning APC/coffee/dip to Motrin/coffee/dip regime in the AM about 1982. The dip is gone and Aleve has taken the place of the Motrin....but the coffee is forever!!!
                  I used to travel with this guy when I was inspecting ships' engineering plants for CINCPACFLT, who had been in a really bad car accident, and went from being 6'4" to 6'2" after they were done jacking around his spinal column. He carried his giant industrial strength bottle of 800MG Motrin everywhere he went. What was interesting was when we'd fly to Japan or the PI every three weeks or so. We'd be on one of those Northwest Airlines DC-10s, with all the pigs and chickens in coach, and he'd be popping those things non-stop and chasing them with Johnny Walker Red. Going through customs at Narita with him was always an adventure.

                  Personally, Motrin is for pussies. Since my skeletal health went south roughly five years ago, I've been on a regimen of Gabapentin, which is an anti-seizure med, but is used off label by neurologists for nerve induced pain, and my best friend Oxycodone. I have to see the pain specialist every month, and pee in the bottle to ensure I'm actually taking them (sounds counter-intuitive when in the military we pee in the bottle to show we AREN'T taking drugs) and not selling them, and I'm subject to being called in for pill counts, out of the blue, again, to ensure I'm taking them as prescribed instead of selling them. It's an Arizona thing, as I've never heard of people I know in California being subjected to anything like that. Here, everyone being treated for pain, even those with stage four cancers get to play that game.

                  I will tell you one thing; it is well that I never dabbled with drugs as a kid. Most especially not with something like heroin. I used to wonder how people could fall into that trap. It's so stupid, yes? Well, that feeling of being wrapped in warm cotton gauze that is part of the opiate experience is quite seductive. I wonder no longer.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Yes, sir.

                    Opiates and opioids are hydras. Being married to an ICU nurse I know about pain management....not to mention my own dealings.

                    I use them sparingly whenever I am prescribed them....and stop as soon as possible. I feel for folks like yourself who have to deal with greater amount of pain.
                    “Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
                    Mark Twain

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      What is their effect if one uses them all the time? I guess the dose will go up to the point of making the user halucinate and making the contacts with the close ones a very traumatic experience.
                      No such thing as a good tax - Churchill

                      To make mistakes is human. To blame someone else for your mistake, is strategic.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Or death...they suppress breathing.
                        “Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
                        Mark Twain

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Doktor View Post
                          What is their effect if one uses them all the time? I guess the dose will go up to the point of making the user halucinate and making the contacts with the close ones a very traumatic experience.
                          No, they aren't hallucinogenic to any great degree of which I'm aware. You just feel good, or maybe the better way to put it, is that you don't feel as bad. In truth, they don't do anything really bad to the body long term. Things like Naproxin (brand name Aleve) and all other NSAIDs are far more dangerous vis-a-vis liver and kidney damage, etc. I cannot take NSAIDs because I have a pre-cancerous condition called Barrett's Esophagus (it's the end result of uncontrolled chronic gastro-esophageal reflux disease; a fancy way of saying uber-heartburn). Anything that can cause bleeding in the stomach is proscribed for people like me, so I take other things. Again, under very close supervision. The biggest issue with opiates and opioids (the former is distilled from actual poppies, the latter is synthetic) is that they can, if one takes too much, kill a person due to suppression of respiration. They are of course habit forming as well. I've gone off of mine from time to time, and there are a couple of bad days where you feel like things are crawling on you, but it's not anything like withdrawing from heroin is supposed to be, and one isn't non-functional, screaming from pain, etc. The pain does become much worse as well because one's own natural endorphins are not being produced at first, but again, it's not anything like heroin is supposed to be. I spend a lot of time in the Jacuzzi whenever I do that. I just seems to make things a bit better. Regardless, I've been on the same, relatively low dose for five years, and I'm no worse for wear.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by desertswo View Post
                            I used to travel with this guy when I was inspecting ships' engineering plants for CINCPACFLT, who had been in a really bad car accident, and went from being 6'4" to 6'2" after they were done jacking around his spinal column. He carried his giant industrial strength bottle of 800MG Motrin everywhere he went. What was interesting was when we'd fly to Japan or the PI every three weeks or so. We'd be on one of those Northwest Airlines DC-10s, with all the pigs and chickens in coach, and he'd be popping those things non-stop and chasing them with Johnny Walker Red. Going through customs at Narita with him was always an adventure.
                            Not that explains things a bit after traveling between Manila and Narita three times a year between 1989-2003.

                            Pigs and chickens in coach? Uh huh...

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by desertswo View Post

                              Personally, Motrin is for pussies. Since my skeletal health went south roughly five years ago, I've been on a regimen of Gabapentin, which is an anti-seizure med, but is used off label by neurologists for nerve induced pain, and my best friend Oxycodone. I have to see the pain specialist every month, and pee in the bottle to ensure I'm actually taking them (sounds counter-intuitive when in the military we pee in the bottle to show we AREN'T taking drugs) and not selling them, and I'm subject to being called in for pill counts, out of the blue, again, to ensure I'm taking them as prescribed instead of selling them. It's an Arizona thing, as I've never heard of people I know in California being subjected to anything like that. Here, everyone being treated for pain, even those with stage four cancers get to play that game.
                              I'm hoping that I can put that off for a long time. If I had known the long term effects of being a member of the 100 mile a month club and walking with stupid amounts of weight on my back I might have considered a change in professions. But such is life.

                              Working with power tools and being on ladders rules out all the "Good" drugs that the Dr's want to give me
                              As it is I switch hit between Celebrex and Motrin every 6 month. Steroid shots in my joints every 4 months. Hot and cold pack most evenings.
                              Tried the way to expensive "Chicken comb cartilage replacement"( Synvisc) series of shots. Worthless.


                              But I'm in that limbo age (51) of you need your knees and a hip replaced but we don't want to do it until you get older.

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X