Originally posted by Gun Grape
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I thought it was just ME.
You know, when I tried to resign, I wanted to just scream into my commander's face: 'Are you completely INSANE? What the hell is WRONG with you, lady? I'm constantly in trouble, I am obviously going down in flames and you won't let me resign? Have you totally lost your MIND? Don't you even CARE about those guys???
My supervisor was standing one pace right flank/rear, and when she said I had to keep going, I totally lost my ****, and even though I was at attention, looked over my shoulder at him, and he was eyes caged/locked-onto the wall behind her head; wouldn't even look at me. I thought he would back me up, because he was one of the grousers about all the stuff that I was letting drop. He came back with, 'Everybody is so busy, you know, ma'am, and if we handed off the Flight to one of the seniors, well, there's spool-up time, and getting everybody used to a new regime...'
My heart sank, and I knew I wasn't going to make the sale. I tried for a little comfort zone for myself on the stuff I was getting gigged for, and she stomped it flat. When we walked back across the street to the main NSA building, I was so shot down that I didn't want to talk, and he was trying to jolly me me up a bit, but I knew he was just glad HE didn't have the crappy job.
But I do remember he said this: 'When you sew on your next stripe, you'll be bullet-proof. If you ever have to fight this battle again, you're going to win.'
He was right, too: when I went to SOCOM, I had some WICKED throw-downs with our SES-2/3 (civilian rank equivalent to a one- and two-star), and I did very well (okay, got thrown out of her office on our first meeting - what is it with me and women bosses?:) ).
But I never had a worse period than that time at Ft Meade.
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