Rollll Tide!

[Prof]

Iron Bowl '09
:)):)):)):)):))

Prof

[dave lukins]

Iron Bowl '09
:)):)):)):)):))

Prof

Prof, let the Brits and others in on the secret...What is Iron Bowl

[Station 22]

Prof, let the Brits and others in on the secret...What is Iron Bowl

It is the yearly football game (not soccer, mind you) between The University of Alabama Crimson Tide and the team on the other side of the state. It is a rather bitter rivalry. If you live in Alabama, you have to chose one or the other at birth.

Alabama is ranked #2 in the nation and the Cow College, as we lovingly refer to that team as, played a much better game than was anticipated.

Iron Bowl - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

[Prof]

It is the yearly football game (not soccer, mind you) between The University of Alabama Crimson Tide and the team on the other side of the state. It is a rather bitter rivalry. If you live in Alabama, you have to chose one or the other at birth.

Alabama is ranked #2 in the nation and the Cow College, as we lovingly refer to that team as, played a much better game than was anticipated.

Iron Bowl - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Well said, statemate. Except...
a) The culprit is Auburn University
b) No choice is made at birth. Some are unfortunately born with, & others happily without, that specific birth defect. It's crippling. Results in large animal veterinarians.

Q: Why are Auburn coeds taught in mandatory remedial freshman health class that semen is white while urine is yellow?
A: So they can tell if their boyfriends are comin' or goin'

Oh. Auburn play quality. Yeah, they sure did. Probably brought in some ringers from Florida.

Prof

[Julie]

Iron Bowl '09
:)):)):)):)):))

Prof

My son was talking about Alabama last night....they beat Auburn 26-21...right? He said they were undefeated. How is that if they are ranked 2nd?

[Prof]

My son was talking about Alabama last night....they beat Auburn 26-21...right? He said they were undefeated. How is that if they are ranked 2nd?

Lady Julie:

There are 6 schools whose teams are undefeated this year. All but one have played 11 games (the Iron Bowl doesn't count, or 'Bama would be 12/0). The non-conformist, Cincinnati, has played 10. Because there isn't really a playoff system a variety of methods are used to rank the teams, all of which typically disagree with one another to a greater or lesser extent. The highly favored 12yo BCS (Bowl Championship Series) ranking is felt to be very scientific, using as it does consideration of
1. Results of a special Harris Poll,
2. Results of USA Today querying 59 college football coaches &
3. The average of 6 "computer rankings" by private individuals who are contracted to provide them, after the highest & lowest ranking for each team is discarded.

Really. If I'm lyin' I'm dyin'.

As of 11/22 Alabama's BCS numerical score is 0.9432 vs #1 Florida's 0.9800, unless you check elsewhere to find that Alabama's score is 0.9614 vs Florida's 0.9664. I guess it's your choice. However, the use of mathematics & computers & large (well, small) transdecimal numbers makes these potentially rancorous rankings better because large clusters of digits are very scientific & allow television talking heads to use the word "parameter" correctly for the first (& last) time in their lives.

Unbeknownst to most people, the rankings are actually determined by a priestly college of trained nutrias maintained in a secret shrine in the depths of the Louisiana bayous. This knowledge is kept from the public & the government because it is felt by the ASHNT (American Society of Sacred Nutria Trainers) that disclosure would prompt the ACLU to raise Church/State issues, & because it might restart the Civil War.

I affirm that some of the foregoing is true.

You're welcome,

Prof

[Shamus]

Well said, statemate. Except...
a) The culprit is Auburn University
b) No choice is made at birth. Some are unfortunately born with, & others happily without, that specific birth defect. It's crippling. Results in large animal veterinarians.

Q: Why are Auburn coeds taught in mandatory remedial freshman health class that semen is white while urine is yellow?
A: So they can tell if their boyfriends are comin' or goin'

Oh. Auburn play quality. Yeah, they sure did. Probably brought in some ringers from Florida.

Prof

Spittin' my Frosted Flakes all over the keyboard Prof

[Shamus]

My son was talking about Alabama last night....they beat Auburn 26-21...right? He said they were undefeated. How is that if they are ranked 2nd?

Because that stupid BCS system is Florida-centric.

Roll Tide!!!!

[Julie]

Prof, you're dying cuz your lying. :)) They can't bring in ringers from Florida ! You are speaking of the Florida Gators ranking 1st, right?

So Florida's ranking as 1st is carrying over from last year, until they play off? If I'm wrong, correct me.

[Prof]

Prof, you're dying cuz your lying. :)) They can't bring in ringers from Florida ! You are speaking of the Florida Gators ranking 1st, right?

So Florida's ranking as 1st is carrying over from last year, until they play off? If I'm wrong, correct me.

Julie:

Fooled you, too, eh? Most people didn't notice all that sand on the cleats, all the silver & blue hair or all the walkers in the stands.

I predict that Florida will win again. Nutrias are hard to please normally, but they can be bought.

Prof

[Station 22]

Well said, statemate. Except...
a) The culprit is Auburn University
b) No choice is made at birth. Some are unfortunately born with, & others happily without, that specific birth defect. It's crippling. Results in large animal veterinarians.

Q: Why are Auburn coeds taught in mandatory remedial freshman health class that semen is white while urine is yellow?
A: So they can tell if their boyfriends are comin' or goin'

Oh. Auburn play quality. Yeah, they sure did. Probably brought in some ringers from Florida.

Prof

Do you know how to get to AuBarn? Well, from my house, you go East 'till you smell it, then North 'till you step in it.

AuBarn has had some successes. They invented the toothbrush. It's true. The proof is that had it been invented anywhere else, it would have been called a teethbrush.

[Prof]

Q: What brought on the Auburn gal's tears?
A: Sombody stole the concrete blocks out from under the family car.

[Prof]

With regard to:

Unbeknownst to most people, the rankings are actually determined by a priestly college of trained nutrias maintained in a secret shrine in the depths of the Louisiana bayous. This knowledge is kept from the public & the government because it is felt by the ASHNT (American Society of Sacred Nutria Trainers) that disclosure would prompt the ACLU to raise Church/State issues, & because it might restart the Civil War

Pardon. I made a factual error. The powerful, influential & secretive interest group is ASONT, the American Society of Oracular Nutria Trainers. Sorry for the confusion.

Prof

[Prof]

Julie:

Fooled you, too, eh? Most people didn't notice all that sand on the cleats, all the silver & blue hair or all the walkers in the stands.

I predict that Florida will win again. Nutrias are hard to please normally, but they can be bought.

Prof

Julie:

I'm sorry! I misunderstood completely. I thought you were joking. You were actually referring to the fact that nobody from Auburn could find Florida on their best day, even if a hay baler was on the table.

Prof

[Station 22]

Julie:

Fooled you, too, eh? Most people didn't notice all that sand on the cleats, all the silver & blue hair or all the walkers in the stands.

I predict that Florida will win again. Nutrias are hard to please normally, but they can be bought.

Prof

Remember, thet took the 2004 season off, citing undisclosed reasons and appointed a cabal of polecats to fill in for them? That is why the Barn was left out of the BCS game. The polecats didn't want anyone that smelled worse than them possbibly being the National Champions.