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Sending Old Men To War

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  • Sending Old Men To War

    This was brought to my attention recently. I am sending this out in the hopes of brightening someones day.

    Sending old men to war

    If I could, I'd enlist today and help my country track down those responcible for killing thousands of innocent people in New York City and Washington DC. but, I'm over 50 now and the armed forces say I'm too old to track down terrorist. you can't be older than 35 to join the military.
    The've got the whole thing backwards. Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join until you'r at least 35.

    For starters

    Researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every ten seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day,leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.
    Young guys haveen't lived long enought to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. If we can't kill the enemy we'll complain them into submission. " My back hurts!" " I'm hungry" "Where's my remote control?"

    an 18-year-old hasn't had a leagal beer yet and you shouldn't go to war until you'r at least old enough to legally drink. An average old guy, on the other hand, has consumed 126,000 gallons of beer by the time he's 35 and a jaunt through the desert heat with a backpack and m-60 would do wonders for the old beer belly.

    An 18-year-old does not like to get up before 10:00 am. Old guys get up early every morning to pee.

    If old guys are captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd probably forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brain teaser.
    Boot camp would actually be easier for old guys. we're used to getting screamed and yelled at (insert picture of wife here) and we actually like soft food. We've also developed a deep appreciation for guns and rifles. We like them almost better than naps.
    They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and I didn't see a single 20-foot wall with a rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training. I can hear the drill sergant now, "GET DOWN AND GIVE ME....er...one." And the running part is kind of a waste of energy. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

    An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to actually carry on a conversation, and to where pants without the top of his butt crack showing and his boxer shorts sticking out. He still hasn't figured out that a pierced tongue catches food particles and that 400-watt speaker in the back seat of his car can rupture an eardrum. All great reasons to keep our sons at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off to a possible death.

    Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten cowards who attacked our hearts on September 11. The last thing the enemy would want to see right now is a couple of million old farts.
    Removing a single turd from the cesspool doesn't make any difference.

  • #2
    They should find a place for those of us too old, and/or not physically up to being assault troops, to serve.
    No man is free until all men are free - John Hossack
    I agree completely with this Administration’s goal of a regime change in Iraq-John Kerry
    even if that enforcement is mostly at the hands of the United States, a right we retain even if the Security Council fails to act-John Kerry
    He may even miscalculate and slide these weapons off to terrorist groups to invite them to be a surrogate to use them against the United States. It’s the miscalculation that poses the greatest threat-John Kerry

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Confed999
      They should find a place for those of us too old, and/or not physically up to being assault troops, to serve.
      Dad's Army? :) Don't know if you'll get that, maybe you need to be English
      In the realm of spirit, seek clarity; in the material world, seek utility.

      Leibniz

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      • #4
        We laugh, but my dad is a 62-year-old retired marine officer and i bet if he had the opportunity to get back in and go to iraq he'd be gone in a flash.

        The father of a guy i work with was a marine in Korea. When Vietnam got going, he tried to reenlist in the marines as a grunt. Naturally they said no ( he was in his mid to late 30's I guess). He wrote his congressman repeatedly until he got back in. Boot camp and such was tough but the young guys really appreciated having someone there with prior combat experience and maturity. I think he did multiple tours. That's very impressive to me.
        Rule 303

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        • #5
          We lose a lot of experience when we allow servicemen to be put to pasture too early. A forty year old who is experienced and wants to fight is more valuable in combat than a 20 year old, just out of bootcamp, and who does not want to be where all the action is. On the other hand, sometimes the spirit is willing, but the body just aint what it used to be.
          Removing a single turd from the cesspool doesn't make any difference.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by bonehead
            We lose a lot of experience when we allow servicemen to be put to pasture too early. A forty year old who is experienced and wants to fight is more valuable in combat than a 20 year old, just out of bootcamp, and who does not want to be where all the action is. On the other hand, sometimes the spirit is willing, but the body just aint what it used to be.

            Do we remember exactly WHY the USN was able to knock heads in the PTO during WWII? It was because the veteran fliers were sent back the US to train the youngsters in the fine art of air combat against the Japanese.
            And what did Japan do with her aces? Kept them in combat until most of them were shot down. Their up and comers had to do without the voice of experience.
            It probably made not much difference in the end, but still....
            “He was the most prodigious personification of all human inferiorities. He was an utterly incapable, unadapted, irresponsible, psychopathic personality, full of empty, infantile fantasies, but cursed with the keen intuition of a rat or a guttersnipe. He represented the shadow, the inferior part of everybody’s personality, in an overwhelming degree, and this was another reason why they fell for him.”

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            • #7
              Great article. Loved it.

              Cheers!...on the rocks!!

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              • #8
                Agree totally with the posts here. Perhaps we could use older veterans as DI's or find some sort of non combat job.

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