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  • Most Dangerous Toys

    10 Most Dangerous Toys

    This is a blog, but funny. (and mostly true!) toys sure have come a long way since I was a kid.
    "To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are."-Sholem Asch

    "I always turn to the sports page first, which records people's accomplishments. The front page has nothing but man's failures."-Earl Warren

    "I didn't intend for this to take on a political tone. I'm just here for the drugs."-Nancy Reagan, when asked a political question at a "Just Say No" rally

    "He no play-a da game, he no make-a da rules."-Earl Butz, on the Pope's attitude toward birth control

  • #2
    I want a Nuclear Lab at home like johns' got...I WANT IT..I WANT IT...WAAAAHHHHH...
    "To every man upon this earth, Death cometh soon or late;
    And how can a man die better; Than facing fearful odds,
    For the ashes of his father; And the temples of his gods."

    Comment


    • #3
      I want a Bat Masterson Belt Buckle Derringer - with a REAL Derringer in .357 magnum.

      I also want a Rebel cannon. The carriage is just the right size for the cast steel barrel of my Naval cannon (built the carriage myself) that shoots REAL cannon balls (1.25" caliber) with REAL gunpowder.

      By the way, those boys in the cannon commerical, I wonder how many of them went on to adulthood as re-inactors and now put on demonstrations with real guns (firing blanks of course).

      I used to have a wood and cardboard replica of a Browning 1917 water cooled machine gun that by hand crank action actually "fired" wooden bullets. The hard part was finding all the bullets later under the furniture so I could reload.
      Able to leap tall tales in a single groan.

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      • #4
        Lol. I had 2 of the 10 as a kid.

        The Jarts were awesome. We always set up the targets in the front and back yards and threw them over the house blind. We had a few minor injuries, but nothing worse than we did on our bikes.

        I had one of the rubber toy makers too. It came with a bunch of pins also, so you could make little pin on scorpions and worms to wear to school. They tasted like crap.

        I'm surprised the hot wheels supercharger didn't get at least an honorable mention. A simple ramp exiting the supercharger would launch that little steel car hard enough to put a pretty good ding in the wall across the room.

        Another good one was the SST toys. Had a big rubber flywheel in the center, and when you pulled the zip cord it would really get spinning. We used to burn the crap out of each other's arms with those things. The smash-up derby version had the added feature of pieces that flew all over when they crashed, lol.
        Last edited by highsea; 29 Dec 06,, 22:30.
        "We will go through our federal budget – page by page, line by line – eliminating those programs we don’t need, and insisting that those we do operate in a sensible cost-effective way." -President Barack Obama 11/25/2008

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        • #5
          Here's one from the "what were they thinking" collection.

          Aquapets were one of the hottest tech toys in 2004. This one seems to be targeted to a fairly a specific demographic...
          Attached Files
          "We will go through our federal budget – page by page, line by line – eliminating those programs we don’t need, and insisting that those we do operate in a sensible cost-effective way." -President Barack Obama 11/25/2008

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by highsea View Post
            Here's one from the "what were they thinking" collection.

            Aquapets were one of the hottest tech toys in 2004. This one seems to be targeted to a fairly a specific demographic...
            Now thats one thing I never expected to see Dora's smiley little face on.

            But then again, if Hello Kitty gets one, why not Dora?;)
            "To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are."-Sholem Asch

            "I always turn to the sports page first, which records people's accomplishments. The front page has nothing but man's failures."-Earl Warren

            "I didn't intend for this to take on a political tone. I'm just here for the drugs."-Nancy Reagan, when asked a political question at a "Just Say No" rally

            "He no play-a da game, he no make-a da rules."-Earl Butz, on the Pope's attitude toward birth control

            Comment


            • #7
              Not dangerous (unless the girls started fighting over it), but the Harry Potter Nimbus 2000 was apparently pretty popular, lol
              “The Nimbus 2000 features a grooved stick and handle for easy riding. Enhancing the excitement are the vibrating effects and magical swooping and whooshing sounds the broom makes when on. Sounds can also be activated when the switch is set in standby mode. Requires three AA batteries (included),” reviewer Larry White adds.

              A check of other online toy stores shows that description to be accurate.

              Sarah Rosales, Vice President of Public Relations for Mattel's Entertainment Division said, “Our intent in creating the Nimbus 2000 Flying Broomstick was to bring the magic of the fictional ”Harry Potter“ tale to life for children. The toy was created to mimic the effect of flying and uses batteries to produce swooshing sound effects.”

              “At Mattel, the well-being of children is always our top priority.”

              Rosales added that Mattel “does not consider the toy inappropriate” adding that they “apologize that some parents may consider it to be [inappropriate], but that was not the company's intention.”

              Customer reviews of the toy are mixed. A reviewer identified as “A toy enthusiast from New Jersey” described her shock when she purchased the toy for her daughter last Christmas.

              “It wasn’t until after she opened her gift and started playing with it that I realized that the toy may offer a more than sensational experience. The broomstick has cute sound effects and ***VIBRATES*** when they put it between their legs to fly,” she wrote on December 26, 2001.

              “Come on — what were the creators of this toy thinking? She’ll keep playing with the Nimbus 2000, but with the batteries removed,” she added.

              Other reviewers were apparently not as quick on the uptake. “Ashley” from Texas is one who found nothing unusual with the toy.

              “My 12-year-old daughter is a big Harry Potter fan, and loved the part with the Nimbus 2000, so I decided to buy her this toy,” Ashley wrote on June 11, 2002. “Even my daughter’s friends enjoy playing with this fun toy. I was surprised at how long they can just sit in her room and play with this magic broomstick!!”

              Other reviewers seemed to be simply clueless. “Poola13” from Ohio noted how popular the toy was with his/her 12-year-old daughter and her friends. Poola13 added in the June 11, 2002, review that, “they play for hours in her bedroom with this great toy. They really seem to like the special effects it offers (the sound effects and vibrating). My oldest daughter (17) really likes it too!”
              http://www.cultureandfamily.org/arti...oryid=cfreport
              "We will go through our federal budget – page by page, line by line – eliminating those programs we don’t need, and insisting that those we do operate in a sensible cost-effective way." -President Barack Obama 11/25/2008

              Comment


              • #8
                all my parents ever got me were Barbies and Cabbage Patch Kids. NEVER a vibrating broomstick!!
                "To dream of the person you would like to be is to waste the person you are."-Sholem Asch

                "I always turn to the sports page first, which records people's accomplishments. The front page has nothing but man's failures."-Earl Warren

                "I didn't intend for this to take on a political tone. I'm just here for the drugs."-Nancy Reagan, when asked a political question at a "Just Say No" rally

                "He no play-a da game, he no make-a da rules."-Earl Butz, on the Pope's attitude toward birth control

                Comment


                • #9
                  Weren't you a good girl?
                  "We will go through our federal budget – page by page, line by line – eliminating those programs we don’t need, and insisting that those we do operate in a sensible cost-effective way." -President Barack Obama 11/25/2008

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    highsea and I had the same toys - lawn jarts and creepy crawlers. I loved the creepy crawler thing - stinky old plastic goop turned into plastic little figures that I could rip the legs off and mutilate the bodies of. Never knew of anyone who ever impaled someone or was impaled by lawn jarts. Just how do people manage to do that to themselves? I feel a vibrating broomstick would have been better and perhaps least damaging to my psyche than the plastic goo that I loved to hate.
                    Welcome, you step into a forum of the flash bang, chew toy hell, and shove it down your throat brutal honesty. OoE

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Debbie View Post
                      ...Never knew of anyone who ever impaled someone or was impaled by lawn jarts.
                      Debbie, we tried to get each other.

                      We had a game called "stretch". This was played with fixed blade hunting knives, like buck knives, but jarts would substitute in a pinch.

                      You started by facing each other at arms length, feet together. From this standing position, you take turns throwing the knife into the ground next to the other player's foot.

                      The knife has to stick firmly in the ground, and it has to be within one knife-length from the other players foot to count. The other player then moves his foot out to where the knife is, and pulls it out of the ground.

                      Then it's his turn to throw it at your feet. The object is to make the other player fall over first. You keep taking turns, gradually doing the splits until one guy falls down or gets a knife in his foot. It's fun and occasionally painful. Of course you want to inflict more pain on your opponent than he inflicts on you, but that goes without saying.

                      We shot pollywogs out of homemade cannons too, but that's another story...
                      Last edited by highsea; 30 Dec 06,, 06:29.
                      "We will go through our federal budget – page by page, line by line – eliminating those programs we don’t need, and insisting that those we do operate in a sensible cost-effective way." -President Barack Obama 11/25/2008

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by highsea View Post
                        Debbie, we tried to get each other.

                        We had a game called "stretch". This was played with fixed blade hunting knives, like buck knives, but jarts would substitute in a pinch.

                        You started by facing each other at arms length, feet together. From this standing position, you take turns throwing the knife into the ground next to the other player's foot.

                        :

                        We played the same game during lunch break in High School. Then the teachers forbid us from using real knives. So we switched to screwdrivers and/or ice picks. That was then forbidden. I found a piece of wood dowling that fit perfectly in the large hole of the pencil sharpener and put a neat point on it.

                        We called it "The splits" until one of us just could not stretch his legs further. The best was a beautiful girl that I was in love with. What made her feat so fantastic was that she was in a full body cast from having curvature of the spine straightened out.

                        Sigh! Though I loved her, she married a sailor instead.
                        Able to leap tall tales in a single groan.

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                        • #13
                          Fools and their fun

                          Dangerous? It depends on what your used to. When I was a youth the approved method of dealing with a snake was for one to poke at the head with a stick so it would strike at you. When it struck the other would quickly(!) grab it's tail swinging it into an arc that continued with the snake whirling around your head.

                          The centrifugal force kept the snake from reaching back and biting you. You then whirled the snakes head against a big rock or other hard object like a fence post to kill it. This actually worked pretty good with copperheads and the occasional though rarer rattlesnake. DON"T try this with a cottonmouth! They are way too aggressive and will come after the guy with the stick (and anyone else close).

                          My wife and at least some of my children are alternately shocked and appalled by my description of this "sport". Those of my children that say "cool" with that certain glint in their eye I keep a close eye on, they are of my own heart.:)

                          Those "good ole boys" didn't think it was such a big deal. At the time neither did I. I just didn't know any better (yet).
                          Reddite igitur quae sunt Caesaris Caesari et quae sunt Dei Deo
                          (Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar's and unto God the things which are God's)

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                          • #14
                            Here's the 1961 ad for the Johnny Reb cannon.

                            <object width="425" height="350"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ClIFdoo26Ww"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ClIFdoo26Ww" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"></embed></object>
                            "Every man has his weakness. Mine was always just cigarettes."

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by highsea View Post
                              Here's one from the "what were they thinking" collection.

                              Aquapets were one of the hottest tech toys in 2004. This one seems to be targeted to a fairly a specific demographic...
                              Looks like a vibrating dildo....
                              Seek Save Serve Medic

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