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View Full Version : Who do you think the Vikings could beat?



Big Bob
29 Oct 06,, 01:52
Let's say the Vikings are led by their best king ever. The Viking Age IIRC was from the late 8th to late 11th centuries. What civilizations, peoples, etc do you think the Norsemen could defeat?

Big Bob
29 Oct 06,, 05:03
Hmm...apparently my thread isn't getting much in terms of results. So I guess I'll put together some fights:
-Vikings VS Romans (early or late Roman Empire, but not when it was at its peak)
-Vikings VS Mongols (1st fight led by Genghis, 2nd fight led by anyone else, this can be at any point in the time of the Mongol Empire)
-Vikings VS Huns (1st fight led by Attila, 2nd fight led by anyone else, this can be at any point in the time of the Mongol Empire)
-Vikings VS Greeks
-Vikings VS Israelites (note that for the fights where the Vikings have to cross harsh terrain, just assume that for whatever reason they can easily survive in and cross the deserts and stuff)
-Vikings VS Egyptians
-Vikings VS Persians
-Vikings VS Assyrians
-Vikings VS Scotsmen (say, 9th century Scotsmen)
-Vikings VS Celts (Irish Celts)
-Vikings VS Anglo-Saxons
-Vikings VS Gauls (1st fight the Gauls are led by Vercingetorix, 2nd time led by anyone else)
-Vikings VS Chinese (in the time of the Viking Age)
-Vikings VS Japanese (also Viking Age, which I guess the height of was in the 9th century, at least I think)
-Vikings VS ancient Germanics
-Vikings VS Franks (although I guess this is pretty predetermined, since the Vikings beat the French and settled part of it, creating Normandy, but let me know what you think)
-Vikings VS Arabs/Saracens (1st fight led by Saladin, 2nd led by anyone else)
-Vikings VS Russians
-Vikings VS American/Canadian Indians
-Vikings VS East Indians (the kind from India, not the other kind of Indian)
-Vikings VS Africans
-Vikings VS Incas/Incans
-Vikings VS Mayans
-Vikings VS Aztecs
-Vikings VS Olmecs
-Vikings VS Crusaders
-Vikings VS Carthaginians (1st fight led by Hannibal, 2nd led by anyone else)
-Vikings VS Macedonians (1st fight led by Alexander, 2nd fight led by anyone else)
-Vikings VS Sumerians
-Vikings VS Babylonians
-Vikings VS Mesopotamians
-Vikings VS Turks

Assume that the Vikings are as tough as they were in the height of the Viking Age and that they're all pagan and cannot be converted to other religions. Also, don't forget that it applies for this fight that the Vikings are led by their best and toughest king/leader/ruler. And another thing of note is that no gunpowder or explosives are allowed. The Vikings, for the case of these fights, are unified and will never fight each other, only the enemies.

neyzen
29 Oct 06,, 05:24
Vikings VS Turks

score: 1-1

Vikings were stipendiarian in Byzantium army and in another army. Turks got the first round and Vikings got the second one. We have also a historical/fantastic movie about Vikings and Turks.

http://www.kameraarkasi.org/sinema/sinemadaakimlar/tarkan/vikingkani/vikingkani_afis.jpg

zraver
29 Oct 06,, 08:04
-Vikings VS Mongols (1st fight led by Genghis, 2nd fight led by anyone else, The Mongols smashed the Rus principalities on both European expiditions

-Vikings VS Scotsmen Oh Lord save us from the foul Norsemen. Plenty of Lowland Scots were givena blood eagle

-Vikings VS Celts (Irish Celts), The Vikings took/created Dublin

-Vikings VS Anglo-Saxons The Vikings exterminated the Saxon kindgoms of England

-Vikings VS Franks The Vikinhs carved Normady out of Frankish lands
-
-Vikings VS Russians The Vikings founded modern Russian society

-Vikings VS American/Canadian Indians Vikings were unable to keep colonies on the North American coast

-Vikings VS Turks, The Turks feared the Vangarian Guard

Amled
29 Oct 06,, 10:29
The obvious candidate would of course be Canute the ”Great”, who for a brief moment in history, in the 11th Century was king of most of Scandinavia and England. Actually he was more a Dane then a Viking, as this was in last part of the “so-called” Viking age.
If he’d a had the full power of these lands behind him, there probably wouldn’t have been a power in Europe to stop him, until he had reached the kingdoms of Almohad Iberia and the rest of the Muslim kingdoms.
But then the same could be said for any of the ethnic tribes in Europe, like the English, French and others, if they had united instead of spending their time fighting each other they could have overcome the rest, but they weren’t capable of such an enterprise… yet.

Semper Fi
29 Oct 06,, 16:57
-Vikings VS Incas/Incans
-Vikings VS Mayans
-Vikings VS Aztecs

The Vikings would own those three. The Spaniards had no problem with them and they weren't known to be great warriors. Although if the Aztecs didn't have their sacrifice fetish they might of stood a chance.

Oh, and the Olmecs would of also been massacred.

jfruser
31 Oct 06,, 02:08
Hey, I'll take up for hte Hidalgos.

The Spanish had just completed their existential fight with the moors in 1492. I bet there were quite a few hardened veterans taking it to the Aztecs/Incas, etc. FWIW, I had hte impression that the Spanish had the best european warriors/army in those days. I would like some more data on this point, however.

But, I agree, the Vikings would have eaten their lunch due to the nature of the pre-Columbian cultures, especially WRT warfighting.

Alejandro
30 Oct 11,, 22:21
ok listen up fools , the spanish had guns it was this advanced weaponry and disease brought from Europe that wiped out the indigenous people of south America , a battle involving spears and shields and swords etc etc , well i think the aztecs were very ruthless and would give most other warriors a run for their money , and the incans were also good fighters and extremely strong.

Doktor
30 Oct 11,, 22:52
someone have mercy on the kittens

YellowFever
30 Oct 11,, 22:53
At least the Vikings never necro-posted....

bigross86
30 Oct 11,, 23:18
The Minnesota Vikings are 2-6 and are at the bottom of the pack

Mihais
30 Oct 11,, 23:21
Some kitten will see Valhalla soon.I drink from my horn to that.Hey,slave,fetch me that barrell of beer.

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 00:17
Mihais...you're just getting weird, dude...

S2
31 Oct 11,, 06:40
"Mihais...you're just getting weird, dude..."

Bullsh!t. He calls for the ritual sacrifice. As it is written, so shall it be-

snapper
31 Oct 11,, 06:52
"-Vikings VS Anglo-Saxons The Vikings exterminated the Saxon kindgoms of England"

The last Viking invasion of England ended at Stamford Bridge. Unless you maintain that Harold was a 'viking' I can't call that extermination. You could possibly maintain that the Normans were 4th generation vikings, from Rolo but if so this makes ALL Norman victories, from Sicily to Antioch 'viking' victories.

Mihais
31 Oct 11,, 07:06
To be fair, my lady,Harold's army was as viking as it could be by that time.The argument was about the viking victories that led to Danelaw,rather than later era.

Heck,the Varangian Guard was named the English guard after the wave of Saxon huscarls that went East to ply their trade after Hastings.Can't get more viking than being an axebearing foreigner.

Mihais
31 Oct 11,, 07:13
Mihais...you're just getting weird, dude...

Dude,you'll be in sensitivity training for a month if I'd go full steam asking for a proper viking funeral sacrifice.I'm that moderate because it involves only kitten,brave as they be.So,sadly,only the drinking beer part.:biggrin:
Until we're talking about humans :Dancing-Banana:-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&v=K5uQcU92x2o

tankie
31 Oct 11,, 13:24
"-Vikings VS Anglo-Saxons The Vikings exterminated the Saxon kindgoms of England"

The last Viking invasion of England ended at Stamford Bridge.


Thats what happens when ya fall foul of Chelsea supporters :whome:

dave lukins
31 Oct 11,, 13:53
Thats what happens when ya fall foul of Chelsea supporters :whome:

That one may be lost into the ether Eric:rolleyes:

tankie
31 Oct 11,, 13:58
That one may be lost into the ether Eric:rolleyes:


:biggrin::biggrin:

Albany Rifles
31 Oct 11,, 14:29
The Vikings have a bye this weekend...the bye is favored by 4.

FJV
31 Oct 11,, 18:36
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjN1NgwTjdg

:whome::whome::whome::whome:

Alejandro
31 Oct 11,, 19:12
vikings were beastly fighters , but they were not organised and so could not sustain their empire

zraver
31 Oct 11,, 20:53
vikings were beastly fighters , but they were not organised and so could not sustain their empire

I smell a chew toy...

Doktor
31 Oct 11,, 21:03
I smell a chew toy...

This one wont be as tasty as some of the former ones.

Chew-gods are on vacation, troll gods are on :(

Albany Rifles
31 Oct 11,, 21:16
Alejandro,

Welcome to the WAB.

Newcomers are asked to go to the Members Introduction Thread and tell us about themselves....and then go and read the Survivors Guide so they enjoy a long and fruitful stay at the WAB.

Member Introductions (http://www.worldaffairsboard.com/member-introductions/)


**HINT **HINT***

bigross86
31 Oct 11,, 21:19
AR, I already hit him up with a friendly suggestion in the gay rights thread. I'm sure you're already locked and loaded and have him dead in your sights (if Tarek doesn't get to him first...)

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 21:50
Oh sure, no one ever told me to read the Survivor's Guide. No one ever hinted that I should make an intro thread.

No one ever paid any attention to me when I first got here. :mad:

You guys are just lucky I turned out to be an awesome and stellar contributor to this dump.

bigross86
31 Oct 11,, 23:10
Interesting how you were supposed to be told to read a thread that was written TWO YEARS AFTER YOU SHOWED UP HERE

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 23:19
Oh.

What did I tell you about confusing me with the facts?

Doktor
31 Oct 11,, 23:23
Not to confuse with facts

bigross86
31 Oct 11,, 23:31
I tried to be as non-confusing and as clear as I could possibly be. Apparently you're quite easily confused...

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 23:33
No, I'm not, tankie.

Quit yer whining and go ride your trike.

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 23:35
Where's the kraut admin, btw?

bigross86
31 Oct 11,, 23:37
No, I'm not, tankie.

Quit yer whining and go ride your trike.

Where did that come from? tankie hasn't posted in this thread in a while...

Doktor
31 Oct 11,, 23:45
You and your facts!

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 23:46
Where did that come from? tankie hasn't posted in this thread in a while...


I tried to be as non-confusing and as clear as I could possibly be. Apparently you're quite easily confused...

Sorry..bad attempt at humor.

bigross86
31 Oct 11,, 23:49
Sorry..bad attempt at humor.

I've come to expect nothing less from you

YellowFever
31 Oct 11,, 23:51
I've come to expect nothing less from you

Ungrateful bastard...

gunnut
01 Nov 11,, 00:34
Viking long boats vs Mongolian horse archers...

The long boat could carry more than a dozen warriors. A horse could carry only one...

However, the horse also serves as a mobile protein storage for the warrior where as the Vikings couldn't eat their boats if they were out of food.

Doktor
01 Nov 11,, 00:37
But six of the Vikings could eat the other six and still have the boat and still outnumber the Mongolians without horses ;)

gunnut
01 Nov 11,, 00:39
But six of the Vikings could eat the other six and still have the boat and still outnumber the Mongolians without horses ;)

Hmmm...I hadn't thought of that...

Looks like it's Vikings 1, Mongols 0

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 04:31
Pffttttt.....One good Mongolian horse archer can kill them all before they get to shore.

bigross86
01 Nov 11,, 07:15
I've come to expect nothing less from you


Yeah, that kinda makes sense...

Fixed that for ya! :biggrin: :Dancing-Banana:

Doktor
01 Nov 11,, 07:18
Pffttttt.....One good Mongolian horse archer can kill them all before they get to shore.

The good Mongolian archers are busy eating the horses.

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 08:02
And the good Vikings are busy eating each other...what's yer point?

bigross86
01 Nov 11,, 08:21
I think he wants you to eat his shorts

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 08:21
He's gonna have to buy me flowers and take me out first....

tankie
01 Nov 11,, 11:20
Oh.

What did I tell you about confusing me with the facts?

Replace C with R = no confusion

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 16:39
Replace C with R = no confusion

Thank you, tankie.

I expected nohing less from you. :slap:

tankie
01 Nov 11,, 16:47
Thank you, tankie.

I expected nohing less from you. :slap:

Blessed are they that expect nothing and the expected , for they shall not be disappointed


Tankie , chapter 1 verse 1

book of xmas presents and birthdays :whome:

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 16:49
"Pass the beer and bugger off while I watch this documentary on little green men."


Tankie , chapter 1 verse 2

tankie
01 Nov 11,, 17:12
"Pass the beer and bugger off while I watch this documentary on little green men."


Tankie , chapter 1 verse 2


Random thread , Vatican and NASA ,,,,buggering off now yella , and I know for a fact that you being an enigma , are going to be operated on by said green men , as will all disbelievers ,, you 1st coz you sprout so much shit are having your hemmmmmmmeroids removed by laser and checking to see if there is light at the end of the tunnnel , which we all know there will be ,, let in by your ears , now off ya pop and check out the thread :whome:

gunnut
01 Nov 11,, 18:26
And the good Vikings are busy eating each other...what's yer point?

Uh...huh huh huh....

Anyone catch the brand new episode of Beavis and Butthead last week?

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 19:31
Random thread , Vatican and NASA ,,,,buggering off now yella , and I know for a fact that you being an enigma , are going to be operated on by said green men , as will all disbelievers ,, you 1st coz you sprout so much shit are having your hemmmmmmmeroids removed by laser and checking to see if there is light at the end of the tunnnel , which we all know there will be ,, let in by your ears , now off ya pop and check out the thread :whome:

Mr. lukins......Snapper....?

Translation, please?

YellowFever
01 Nov 11,, 19:31
Uh...huh huh huh....

Anyone catch the brand new episode of Beavis and Butthead last week?

Whoa.....that show still on?

Wow.

gunnut
01 Nov 11,, 19:59
Whoa.....that show still on?

Wow.

It just came back with all new episodes.

Thursday night 10pm on MTV

bigross86
01 Nov 11,, 20:08
It pisses me off that MTV doesn't have music on it anymore. At least it used to piss me off until I stopped watching television...

Parihaka
01 Nov 11,, 21:24
Random thread , Vatican and NASA ,,,,buggering off now yella , and I know for a fact that you being an enema , are going to be operated on by said green men , as will all disbelievers ,, you 1st coz you sprout so much shit are having your hemmmmmmmeroids removed by laser and checking to see if there is light at the end of the tunnnel , which we all know there will be ,, let in by your ears , now off ya pop and check out the thread :whome:

Fixed it for ya. Make sense now Yellow?

bigross86
01 Nov 11,, 22:00
Makes sense to me...

cyppok
01 Nov 11,, 22:46
-Vikings VS Mongols (1st fight led by Genghis, 2nd fight led by anyone else, The Mongols smashed the Rus principalities on both European expiditions

-Vikings VS Scotsmen Oh Lord save us from the foul Norsemen. Plenty of Lowland Scots were givena blood eagle

-Vikings VS Celts (Irish Celts), The Vikings took/created Dublin

-Vikings VS Anglo-Saxons The Vikings exterminated the Saxon kindgoms of England

-Vikings VS Franks The Vikinhs carved Normady out of Frankish lands
-
-Vikings VS Russians The Vikings founded modern Russian society[* my reply below]

-Vikings VS American/Canadian Indians Vikings were unable to keep colonies on the North American coast

-Vikings VS Turks, The Turks feared the Vangarian Guard

[There is kind of a dispute on this to a degree, ergo the west says Russia was conquered/colonized by Vikings while Russia basically says
that Rurik was a nephew of the grand duke of Novgorod and when that guy died he inherited the title and founded a couple of cities as shifted down.
I do not think there were lots of settlements from Sweden other than two or three which were anihilated by Ivan Grozny for insuburdination.]

I think the Saxon kingdoms were suppressed and not annihilated since they essentially were absorbed and re-created after Dane-Law and Norman conquest. Also you have to consider that Anglo and Saxons were essentially a mix between low-Germans and Danes (geographically), and Danes are also vikings to a degree. So it could be said Vikings vs Vikings on that one in a sense.

YellowFever
02 Nov 11,, 00:16
Fixed it for ya. Make sense now Yellow?

Are you Mr. lukins or Snapper????? :mad:

tankie
02 Nov 11,, 11:52
Are you Mr. lukins or Snapper????? :mad:

Nope , he's Hagar the orrible :whome:

Albany Rifles
02 Nov 11,, 13:54
Pari,

How the hell is a book from Jane Austen about a girl named Enema going to help Tankie?`

tankie
02 Nov 11,, 14:01
Pari,

How the hell is a book from Jane Austen about a girl named Enema going to help Tankie?`

Its for yella .

Albany Rifles
02 Nov 11,, 14:59
Its for yella .

Oh, well THAT explains it!

Parihaka
02 Nov 11,, 18:30
Pari,

How the hell is a book from Jane Austen about a girl named Enema going to help Tankie?`:biggrin: Bacause Tankie's trying to match-make Old Yeller and BR, ignorant of the torch Yeller carries for Tankie?

As a complete tangent, your post gave me a major flashback to primary school. The only tanker I've met in the real world was my headmaster. He told me how he used to keep himself sane driving through Nth Africa by reading Austen and Yeats. Great man.

YellowFever
02 Nov 11,, 18:52
Wait....wait....

There's a book wih a girl named, "Enema" ?

Where can I find this book?

tankie
02 Nov 11,, 19:58
:biggrin: Bacause Tankie's trying to match-make Old Yeller and BR, ignorant of the torch Yeller carries for Tankie?

As a complete tangent, your post gave me a major flashback to primary school. The only tanker I've met in the real world was my headmaster. He told me how he used to keep himself sane driving through Nth Africa by reading Austen and Yeats. Great man.

Well he can douse that torch , Tankies , ALL great men Pari ;), cept clerks :pari:

Albany Rifles
02 Nov 11,, 20:05
Wait....wait....

There's a book wih a girl named, "Enema" ?

Where can I find this book?

Check on top of the toilet tank in BR's bathroom.

He keeps it hidden under his SI collection (Sheeps Illustrated).

bigross86
02 Nov 11,, 20:09
The only books you'll find in my bathroom are different editions of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncle_John's_Bathroom_Reader)

You seem to have me confused with Pari or TJ

tankie
02 Nov 11,, 21:16
The only books you'll find in my bathroom are different editions of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncle_John's_Bathroom_Reader)



Yea but it dont say nowt about UFO's does it , warra shit read :biggrin:

bigross86
02 Nov 11,, 21:17
Actually some of them do have stuff about UFO's, whether the moon landing was real, etc...

YellowFever
02 Nov 11,, 21:19
You seem to have me confused with Pari or TJ

Forgive him.

Rifle's a mod.

He's trying his best.....

tankie
02 Nov 11,, 21:19
Actually some of them do have stuff about UFO's, whether the moon landing was real, etc...

Read it yet then and are they real , hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm :whome:

bigross86
02 Nov 11,, 21:22
The only benefit they have is for good reading in the bathroom, that's about it. The UFO's and all those theories, that is...

YellowFever
02 Nov 11,, 21:23
Who taught tankie to read? :mad:

Nightowl
02 Nov 11,, 21:37
Same guy that taught him to count money before handing off the dope

Albany Rifles
03 Nov 11,, 13:55
Forgive him.

Rifle's a mod.

He's trying his best.....

Mr. Fever, you can be replaced....by a hemorrhoid.

Doktor
03 Nov 11,, 14:03
And you will feel better?

bigross86
03 Nov 11,, 14:15
No, then AR will have two hemorrhoids :biggrin: :Dancing-Banana:

Doktor
03 Nov 11,, 14:16
He replaced you, too? Hmmm...

bigross86
03 Nov 11,, 14:32
Nope, I'm good ol' Ben, the same I've always ever been. Now that he's replaced Yellow he's got a festering boil on his ass and a hemorrhoid.

YellowFever
03 Nov 11,, 17:44
Nope, I'm good ol' Ben, the same I've always ever been.

My condolences...

tankie
03 Nov 11,, 18:17
Who taught tankie to read? :mad:

My dear ol mum :wors:, I could read and write aged 4 , as could most kids back then when not a lot had TV ,playstations etc ;)

Doktor
03 Nov 11,, 18:25
My dear ol mum :wors:, I could read and write aged 4 , as could most kids back then when not a lot had TV ,playstations etc ;)

Poor woman :tongue:

Yello has text to voice and voice to text software, he is glad IT evolved so much.

His mum is even happier.