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Happy Hanukkah!!!

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  • Happy Hanukkah!!!

    Just read on my desk calendar that Hanukkah begins tonight at sundown.

    So, for all of our Jewish brothers and sisters in the WAB family, I'm extending my warmest wishes for your holiday. Have fun lighting the menorah, and win some money with that dreidel!

    (And a little "Merry Christmas" in advance to all our Christian and/or Christmas-celebrating family members as well.)
    I never understood "fire for effect". I thought the firing WAS the effect...

  • #2
    I heard Jewish kids get presents every day of Hannukah. Is that true?
    "Every man has his weakness. Mine was always just cigarettes."

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    • #3
      Yep, presents for 8 nights in a row! Mucho fun!

      Bear with me on this one:

      'Twas the night before Hanukkah
      and all over the place
      There was noise, there was kvetching
      Soch ah disgrace!

      Kinderlach, sleeping,
      uneasily felt
      The chocolate rush
      from the Hanukkah gelt

      And me in the easyboy,
      so stuffed with latkes,
      I stretched the elastic
      which held up my gatchkes.

      When up on the roof
      and it has a steep pitch)
      A fat alte kakker
      was making a kvitsch.

      I jumped up real quick
      and I ran to the door,
      Was it a bandeet,
      or only a schnorrer?

      He wasn't alone;
      he had eight ferdelach,
      And called them by name
      as he gave a gebrach:

      "On Moishe, on Yankel, on Itzik, on Sam,
      On Mendel, on Shmendrik, on Feivush, on Ham;
      My kidneys are kvelling;
      do you give a damn?"

      He had a white beard
      and payyes to boot,
      And to keep out the cold,
      he had such a nice suit!

      A second from Peerless,
      I could tell at a glance,
      But the cut was okay,
      and so were the pants.

      He was triple XL,
      a real groisser goof,
      So I yelled out,
      "Meshuggener! Get off from Mein roof!"

      He jumped down and said
      as he shook hands with me,
      "Max Klaus is the name.
      You have maybe some tea?"

      So I gave him a gleisel,
      while he shook his white mop,
      Mutt'ring, "Always the same thing,
      They're dreying my kopp!"

      From Vancouver to Glacer Bay,
      Outremont to Reginek,
      Every shmo in the world
      hakks meir a cheinik!

      They're screaming for presents,
      and challah with schmaltz,
      And from Brooklyn alone,
      the back pain, gevaltz!"

      So we sat and yentehed,
      and we spun the old dreydels,
      (He took all of my money,
      and one of my kanidels)

      He said, "Business is not bad,
      a living I make,
      But I'm getting too old
      for this Hanukkah fake;

      And the cell phones, you see
      how my pacemaker dings?
      For two cents I'd quit,
      and move to Palm Springs?"

      And he gave a geshrei
      as he fled mit a lacht,
      "Gut Yontiff to All,
      Vey is Mir, Such a Nacht!"

      ~Author Unknown~

      Have a HAPPY CHANUKKAH!!!
      Meddle not in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

      Abusing Yellow is meant to be a labor of love, not something you sell to the highest bidder.

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