Thread: Charlie Sheen Gives Civil War Midterm Exam

From Kevin Levin's excellent blog, Civil War memory ( Civil War Memory )



"For my American Civil War midterm, the extra credit was a set of Charlie Sheen quotations. Students could match up to ten of them to appropriate Civil War leaders in particular circumstances. They then had to provide a brief explanation for each match. So, for example, a good answer for #10 would be: “Grant after the fall of Forts Henry and Donalson.” Similarly, a good answer for #5 could be “Forrest while raiding in central Tennessee.”


These are the quotes with my answers....


1. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.
Henry Halleck on the way to Corinth, 1862


2. I don’t sleep; I wait.
Stonewall Jackson, The Valley 62, redux White Oak Swamp 1862


3. “Can’t” is the cancer of “happen.”
Henry Haupt…looking at any rail line after a visit by Confederate raiders


4. I’m a high priest Vatican warlock.
Rosecrans at the prayer session the night before Stones River.


5. I have one speed; I have one gear: GO!
Phil Sheridan, The Valley 1864; redux Petersburg, April 1865


6. They’re the best at what they do. I’m the best at what I do, and it is ON!
Custer screaming across at Wade Hampton’s Brigade, afternoon 3 Jul 63.
7. I think my passion is misinterpreted as anger sometimes. And I don’t think people are ready for the message that I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of violent love.
Edmund Ruffin, Charleston Harbor, April 1861 redux June 1865


8. I’m here and I’m ready. They’re not. Bring it.
Burnside, Fredericksburg 62, waiting on the pontoons.


9. That we are to stand by the President right or wrong is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public.
Clement Vallandigham, 1 May 1863


10. I’m bi-winning. I win here. I win there.
Longstreet, Chickamauga, SEP 63 referring back to 2d Manassas (foggetting that entire Gettysburg thing).

11. Life comes down to a few moments. This is one of them.
Abraham Lincoln, first draft of the opening of what became the Gettysburg Address, 1863


12. Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh.
David Porter, Vicksburg, morning of 17 April 63


13. Fame is empowering. My mistake was that I thought I would instinctively know how to handle it. But there’s no manual, no training course.
John C. Fremont, summer 1862


14. Here’s the good news. If I realize that I’m insane, then I’m okay with it. I’m not dangerous insane.
Cump Sherman, 1861


15. I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists.
John Brown, Pottawotamie Creek, 24 – 25 May 56


What would you say?