glyn

I dreamed of an airline pilot's career.In it was the FAA, crew scheduling, bad schedules, bad management, unserviceable aircraft equipment, changing weather, no extra holding fuel, ever-changing procedures, endless flight manual revisions, dead heading in the middle seat, broken and lost luggage, nasty passenger agents, crabby 65+ year old 170 lb. flight attendants that were 4 axe-handle wide, all-nighters, foreign countries, sleep deprivation, mergers, seniority squabbles, company threats,food poisoning, no food, bad coffee, bidding, pulled away from my family for weeks at a time, fleabag hotels, late cabs and maniac cab drivers, bidding vacation, waiting for gates, weather, low visibility approaches, aircraft de-icing, PCs, Gestapo FAA and company check air man, medicals, commuting to and from work in unspeakable weather, the parking lot from Hell, parking lot buses, inter-terminal busses, spring break, Christmas rush, Easter rush, PA"PC" announcements, insurance, unscheduled drug and alcohol testing, noise violations, customs lineups, dry cleaning, terrorism, security passes, rude security personnel, high gas/oil prices, pay cuts, pensions reduced/eliminated, rush hour traffic, that infernal alarm clock, crash pads, catching cold away from home, lackadaisical crew members, sexual harassment threats, flight attendants and co-pilots implying that they are a gift to aviation after being there a year, back biting, gossip, cell phones, aircraft cram courses, plus laying my job on the line several times a year with simulators, quick access data recorders to spy on pilot procedures, endless procedural memorization and Annual Recurrent Training days.

Then I woke up and joyously found myself Still Retired! Whew!!!

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Semper in excretum. Solum profunda variat.